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Mothers-in-law
Jul. 17th, 2003 11:34 amReading what ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
melancthe said about her mother-in-law got me thinking about mine.
I am blessed in my mother-in-law (MIL) - she had a terrible MIL herself, and vowed that she would do her best to get on with anyone her sons brought home. I reap the benefits of this, for which I am very grateful.
The one thing that strikes me about her is that I suspect that she prefers my son to my daughter (don’t get me wrong, she loves her granddaughter, but I can’t help but feel not as much as her grandson). This may be because she had no daughters herself, only sons, and so is more at ease with boys. Or it may be that DS was her first grandchild and so is special in some way. It may be just that she’s known him longer (5 years as opposed to 3), or that he’s easier to handle, being older. Or it may be that she finds DD harder to manage (I will admit that there is a certain art to it!) - she had a difficult day once when DD was ill and she was looking after her. It may be a bit of all of these. It just makes me feel a teeny bit defensive and protective towards DD when she’s around.
My mum, on the other hand (who had a daughter herself, obviously!) seems to me to get the balance between the two of them much better. Of course, it may just be that my mothering style is similar to hers, so my kids respond to it because it’s what they’re used to. (I never realised how like my mother I was until I had kids.... scary stuff!)
melancthe said about her mother-in-law got me thinking about mine.I am blessed in my mother-in-law (MIL) - she had a terrible MIL herself, and vowed that she would do her best to get on with anyone her sons brought home. I reap the benefits of this, for which I am very grateful.
The one thing that strikes me about her is that I suspect that she prefers my son to my daughter (don’t get me wrong, she loves her granddaughter, but I can’t help but feel not as much as her grandson). This may be because she had no daughters herself, only sons, and so is more at ease with boys. Or it may be that DS was her first grandchild and so is special in some way. It may be just that she’s known him longer (5 years as opposed to 3), or that he’s easier to handle, being older. Or it may be that she finds DD harder to manage (I will admit that there is a certain art to it!) - she had a difficult day once when DD was ill and she was looking after her. It may be a bit of all of these. It just makes me feel a teeny bit defensive and protective towards DD when she’s around.
My mum, on the other hand (who had a daughter herself, obviously!) seems to me to get the balance between the two of them much better. Of course, it may just be that my mothering style is similar to hers, so my kids respond to it because it’s what they’re used to. (I never realised how like my mother I was until I had kids.... scary stuff!)
